Over 99729

Card Demotivational Poster


TAGS: earned not given man card
Rating: 4.7/5

More motifakes by Airman

nicholsjoshua15 - February 7, 2013, 9:30 pm
While I was at work; two neighborhood thugs tried to hassle my mother for money. When I came home she tolled me what the had done. I got my gun and tolled them where to get off and what would happen if the didn't. The never bothered her. Man points +100.
Vampyro - July 22, 2011, 6:39 am
I am going to print that and cut out the card 5L
Airman - July 6, 2011, 11:01 am
you're right Derek.. 6 is about it. I posted it because I thought the list was pretty dumb, and I meant to make a comment about that, but I ended up forgetting about it. Bomb away 440.. that list deserves it.. except, I did always want to be a. lumberjack
rubys - July 5, 2011, 11:15 pm
This an amazing blog post dude. You made some good points there. Thank you so much for sharing it. Kudos! I also wanna share this christmas lights article that we have.
Derek - July 5, 2011, 10:02 pm
Ugh, 6/15 maybe. Any "15/15" men left out there? Anywhere?
440wakeup - July 5, 2011, 10:00 pm
I'm not gonns bomb this but these make you a hill-billy not a man. where is quote godfellas at the appropriate time. When I was 15 I bet 2janitors I could carry a refrigerator up 3 flights of stares faster than the two of them could carry one fdridge up

ALUCARD WALKS INTO A TWILIGHT CONVENTION - "All I said was that vampires don't sparkle"

TAGS: alucard hellsing vampire
Rating: 3.75/5

More motifakes by Alex

FatherTyme - May 4, 2011, 6:23 pm
Hmm, I'd love to see Blade AND Alucard cleaning house. @thatonechick, I saw Hellsing, truly bad@$$. He was pwning let and right and not even caring enough to take names :)
boinger - March 9, 2011, 1:23 pm
vampires actually do sparkle... for .00000000001 seconds b4 they burst into flame
Mooooooooooooooooooo - June 27, 2010, 9:57 pm
He'd probably win a race up your parents basement stairs as well.
TheTrashHeap - June 27, 2010, 9:51 pm
But could he beat you in a spelling bee?
corbett06 - June 27, 2010, 9:49 pm
that faget edward wouldnt stand a chance in satans hell against alucard
LD0ne - May 7, 2010, 9:52 am
nice job *applauds* 5 lions
Portgas D. Ace - December 12, 2009, 10:21 pm
Positive. Edward definiely should meet Alucard *hrhrhr*
angryceltic - December 12, 2009, 12:34 pm
i did and it was awesome
thatonechick - December 12, 2009, 9:56 am
Anybody else watch Hellsing? *crickets chirp*


TAGS: couple cards marriage
Rating: 4.82/5

More motifakes by Airman

GreyScorpion - February 1, 2011, 8:25 am
as you sit there holding Aces and Eights....5L
rerun - January 31, 2011, 8:16 pm

Oh so true.
Faceplant31 - January 31, 2011, 7:16 pm
They don't know sh!t and thats why i'm cleaning my boots off after stomping that last little timmy.
Reality Lord - January 31, 2011, 6:52 pm

p'fffft ....what do they know.
Airman - January 31, 2011, 6:36 pm
thx RL.. not everyone agrees
Reality Lord - January 31, 2011, 4:35 pm

awesome ...as ususal dude
MilDoc - January 31, 2011, 12:54 pm
Nice! Posted like a true narried man! 5L


TAGS: game death cards think again
Rating: 4.79/5

More motifakes by LiquidAngel

5150monkeylove - December 10, 2011, 12:21 pm
Golden! shared on fb
gas - December 8, 2011, 12:21 pm
..keep picking card5
CloudchaserS - December 8, 2011, 10:26 am
There should be a heavy metal song about this m/om/


TAGS: cards poker money cat p****
Rating: 4.69/5

More motifakes by forseti

forseti - January 30, 2012, 9:46 am
lol... thx RL. So tell me, how much do you need?? :D
Reality Lord - January 30, 2012, 7:38 am

typical forseti....epic dude :)
suzieq - January 29, 2012, 5:30 pm


TAGS: life time day safe tv show cardassian kardashian gossip star trek
Rating: 3.84/5

More motifakes by giulio

Bartimaeus - September 14, 2009, 7:41 pm
There's a mistake you could only make once. Good warning. 5/5
Spangle - September 14, 2009, 6:02 pm
Mr. Shiny - July 20, 2009, 7:40 pm
lol I like this one!
Sean - May 31, 2009, 12:04 am
Ridiculously funny. Well done, ya bastard!

CARDASSIANS AND KARDASHIANS - Knowing the difference could save your life

TAGS: card
Rating: 4.1/5

More motifakes by ultimaterorschach

curlyrocks - September 19, 2013, 11:28 pm
5L considering when I first heard about the Kardashians I thought it was a Star Trek thing.
ultimaterorschach - April 15, 2011, 12:40 pm
OK not what I expected to here... but right
Bolverk37782 - April 8, 2011, 1:32 pm
Ya, The KARDASHIANS are a threat to your sanity and if your a Fella your bank balance

SECOND-IN-COMMAND FACEPALM - When the boss doesn't realize how full of fail he really is

TAGS: star trek facepalm riker jean luc picard enterprise
Rating: 3/5

More motifakes by jam1977

DreMagnum - March 15, 2010, 4:14 pm
Its a different pic, from the same scene, but a different pic. Still not funny though.
GreyScorpion - March 15, 2010, 4:10 pm
jam1977, 2nd time you've used this same pic in 2 days. find a new one

20 Something -

GENTLE PERSUASION - Always the best approach

TAGS: car parking card
Rating: 4.85/5

More motifakes by motinet

cedre - December 24, 2010, 10:49 pm
A bar of white soap looks amazingly like a bad scratch...but washes right off. Just sayin'
AdmiralAckbar - October 31, 2010, 10:08 pm
try a dry erase marker
fascistfrenchman - October 30, 2010, 5:49 am
Oh, the times I wish I could these, but it wouldn't be wise to do so in my work parking lot.
Davin Holcomb - October 30, 2010, 3:14 am
no need to have them custom made. i have a stack of these... and i use them. they're uber-cheap on houseofgrafix.com
Mooooooooooooooooooo - June 27, 2010, 10:37 pm
Mrs. Moo+ is making me some of these. 5L

DUELING FACEPALMS - When you're not the only one who realizes how dumb that truly was

WE ARE THE BORG - All your base are belong to us

TAGS: borg base picard all your belong star trek
Rating: 3.13/5

More motifakes by arsonking14

agdaniele - August 9, 2009, 8:59 am
Woodyism #153
union - August 9, 2009, 7:09 am
That is exactly how Patrick Stewart speaks.
arsonking14 - August 9, 2009, 12:10 am

PICARD FACEPALM: - now available to answer stupid guestions on yahoo answers.

TAGS: you know your dumb when someone makes a picard facepalm with ms word
Rating: 4.21/5

More motifakes by Dude 4515

R.S.Jake - May 5, 2010, 10:14 am
Computers are a myth! They are only the images we see after the Government gives us the hypno-drugs! The year is actually 1836, and everything you know and see is a lie! J/K, don't send pretend hate mail. It doesn't exist anyway.
forseti - May 5, 2010, 9:13 am
bats are birds... why are there people who waste their time by giving "correct" answers to such a question?!?*fg*
thatonechick - May 5, 2010, 9:04 am
While we're discussing Yahoo Answers... here is my favorite. http://au.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100421052612AADGqkk
corbett06 - May 5, 2010, 8:56 am
talk about blind faith what a fricken moron
boeweizer - April 29, 2010, 9:01 pm
the idiocy of sum ppl, i mean wow!
CoolioIndeed - April 20, 2010, 3:36 pm
I was gonna give it 5 until I saw the typo. 4L

BIKERS!!....NO. -

TAGS: motorcycle man card
Rating: 4.33/5

More motifakes by Mooooooooooooooooooo

Mooooooooooooooooooo - September 7, 2012, 12:32 am
Need a hug Susan?
ICEMAN - September 6, 2012, 11:43 pm
Wait a minute... Moooooooooooooooo made a poster??? WTF??? Not bad for an amateur.
Sean - September 5, 2012, 11:35 pm
Hilarious too. Uhm, what does it mean if your man card has faded over time ... when once it was red? I'd show you what I mean, but the wife is out and she keeps it in her purse.
Reality Lord - September 5, 2012, 9:52 pm

lolz...it's a very pretty bike.
AcidRain - September 5, 2012, 5:25 pm
That second paragraph caught me off. Awesome, never saw that coming.

THE OVERLORD DOUCHEBAG - Occasionally leaves the safety of his Impenetrable Cardboard Fortress.

TAGS: overlord douchbag impenetrable cardboard fortress
Rating: 4.31/5

More motifakes by MustyK

phydeaux - January 24, 2010, 3:08 pm
Now sit on it and spin. 5L!

POKER FACE - glasses don't always help.....

HEY AL... - I have a whole pocket full of Race Cards. How about you?


TAGS: poker cards life bluff
Rating: 4.4/5

More motifakes by Faceplant31

ICEMAN - October 29, 2010, 8:29 pm
Heh, heh heh. You funny guy! ;)
GreyScorpion - October 29, 2010, 8:27 pm
Ice, I raise you a pair of TV towers...right up your ace!...been waiting all day for that, pumpkin
ICEMAN - October 29, 2010, 8:18 pm
Awwww, I feel special. Mooooooooooooooo will be dreaming of me even in a drunken stupor. Time to get over that obsession of yours cupcake. OBTW, go ahead & raise on the pair of deuces.
Mooooooooooooooooooo - October 29, 2010, 8:06 pm
That's my plan for tonight....Hope you guys have fun jerking each other off while I get drunk and win big..LOL!...yeah, I'm talking to you ICEMAN.

HALLMARK - Always there for us when we can't find those special words.

PRICELESS - 4 Idiots One Smart Guy Priceless He Covered his face and saved his ass


THE ULTIMATE QUESTION - Which is better Kirk or Picard

TAGS: kirk picard star trek
Rating: 2.69/5

More motifakes by Anima

FilthyPhil - December 10, 2011, 4:03 pm
Kirk, Hagar, Wilma, Mrs. Howell
Anima - July 29, 2011, 9:18 am
Hagar, Betty, who the hell are the other two
alazgr8 - July 28, 2011, 1:09 am
"Which" or "who" is better? This not even close to the ultimate question. David Lee Roth or Hagar. Wilma or Betty, Mary Ann or Ginger, that is the question.
Alixian - July 25, 2011, 6:41 am
Sisko is cool, Janeway isn't fit enough to polish Kirk's shoes never mind Picard's head, tough question tho
Anima - July 24, 2011, 3:55 pm
Done that at the local STFC, it was epic
Anima - July 24, 2011, 3:54 pm
easy stay in basement & order, pretend ur part of TMNT
Anima - July 24, 2011, 3:53 pm
Sorry no, Picard had the balls to become Locutus, Kirk took on Khan, and slept with half the galaxy's female residents. Yes Sisko was cool, but not as cool as Picard, Janeway just sucked
Cloudchaser - July 23, 2011, 1:15 am
Wanna have some fun? Go to a Star Trek forum, ask that question, and sit back with a tub of popcorn
Jalozyin - July 22, 2011, 5:35 pm
No, you forgot about Sisco, as well as Janeway! Janeway could kick both their a**es any time.
Sean - July 22, 2011, 3:01 pm
If THAT'S your ultimate question, then you really ought to get a better ultimage question, such as: Table for one vs. stay in basement and order in?

ALUCARD - so badass, he smokes bullets

TAGS: alucard hellsing bullet smoking
Rating: 2.41/5

More motifakes by ichigo9054

Claire - September 30, 2010, 10:05 pm
The guy's username just puts the cherry on top.
Mr. Shiny - September 30, 2010, 10:02 pm
So bad-ass, he doesn't care that he's featured in a ****ty poster.
Anonymous2 - September 30, 2010, 8:04 pm
Also, to the person who submitted this, how about showing clips from the show, instead of promotional art. Y'know, sh**s of him taking down freaks, sh**s of him using his powers.
Anonymous2 - September 30, 2010, 8:01 pm
Zook, he has a really long nose, his glasses have just slid down.
Zook - September 30, 2010, 9:58 am
whats with the eyeball on his forehead?
hootizz - September 30, 2010, 2:30 am
Crankyhead you took the words right out of my mouth...
agdaniele - September 30, 2010, 2:20 am
And here, I thought it was his own John Wayne Bobbit.
crankyhead - September 30, 2010, 2:18 am
That's not a bullet, it's a suppository.
agdaniele - September 30, 2010, 2:17 am
Don't do that! I'd hate to see a horned helmet on any other body part!
Haarakkon - September 30, 2010, 2:17 am
LOL! I swear if I hung out here more often than I do I'd be liable to get a swollen head.
agdaniele - September 30, 2010, 2:14 am
This poster is the anti-Haar. The man is a genius.
agdaniele - September 30, 2010, 2:13 am
I approved it, lover.
Haarakkon - September 30, 2010, 2:10 am
I don't know nor does it matter who approved it, BTW.
Haarakkon - September 30, 2010, 2:10 am
Not pointing fingers or intending to irritate any of the mods, but the safest bet is probably to nuke the d*** thing before it starts.
Faceplant31 - September 30, 2010, 2:07 am
Good call haar, i was thinking the same thing. Now on the other hand the average score of 5 0L votes is still 0L.
Haarakkon - September 30, 2010, 2:07 am
Haarakkon - September 30, 2010, 2:06 am
Dammit, Aggy! Yer solar powered calculator is outta sunlight again. 1+5/2=3.
ICEMAN - September 30, 2010, 2:05 am
Thanks teach. You get an apple.
agdaniele - September 30, 2010, 2:00 am
Although many believe in no vote, they must remember that 0+5=5, but 1+5=2.5
Faceplant31 - September 30, 2010, 1:59 am
This motifake, so effing lame it should not get even a 1L. Sure agg, i agree
agdaniele - September 30, 2010, 1:58 am
Different user, same outcome... this should end it for 2010. Agreed?

DADDY'S SURVIVAL CREDIT CARD - A perfect tool for the real men!

SHOPAHOLIC - He got it all online. Al he had to do was follow the link.

TAGS: link shopping high credit limit first credit card oops
Rating: 3.67/5

More motifakes by Motifake Wit Liberation Front

Freezzy - June 13, 2010, 11:20 pm
Where is the Big Goron Sword!! I demand to know!!
Treehodger - February 14, 2010, 7:06 pm
Ever wonder where he puts it all if he does not have pockets on those tights of his? Yes, this is a rhetorical question. I really don't want to know. Thanks.
Screamin Daemon - December 21, 2009, 9:51 am
So true. I wonder why I never saw it this way before.

POKER - If you're playing a poker game and you look around the table and can't tell who the sucker is, it's you.

FOR EVERYTHING ELSE IN LIFE - there's mastercard

YOUR MAN CARD - It has been taken

NO BRAINER - Kirk rules, Picard drools.

TAGS: kirk picard star trek
Rating: 2.55/5

More motifakes by Mongo

Fatt Matt - July 27, 2009, 12:01 pm
This is an example of how a poster can be really bad, and still be full of fail.
Derek - July 26, 2009, 7:33 pm
In my mind an example of how one can be very different, but just as good.

666 - That credit score is beast, man.


TAGS: race card
Rating: 3.39/5

More motifakes by Todd Snyder

Sean - June 14, 2009, 3:09 am
This "WOrld Series of Poker" to which you refer, what do they mean by "race card"? Is that a term of theirs?

STORMTROOPERS PLAYING POKER - It would be in your best interest to remember what game you are playing.

TAGS: storm trooper cards poker
Rating: 3.89/5

More motifakes by SgtRock

DreMagnum - March 16, 2010, 8:58 pm
Or the fact that an IP can only vote once on each poster. And yes you can vote on your own.
SgtRock - March 16, 2010, 8:55 pm
Can you vote on your stuff? Is that within the rules? What stops me from repeat voting on others posters? Honor system?
phydeaux - March 16, 2010, 6:03 pm
hey hey...the whole gangs here!!
R.S.Jake - March 16, 2010, 5:20 pm
And it's like Phydeaux's family is playing! :)
R.S.Jake - March 16, 2010, 5:20 pm
It made me laugh!
SgtRock - March 16, 2010, 5:14 pm
Whoever approved this, thanks. I didn't think it would be funny enough to post

CAPTAIN PICARD - Never let him drive

TAGS: star trek picard
Rating: 3.46/5

More motifakes by OG

agdaniele - March 20, 2010, 10:41 am
This has a Megaforce feel!
rerun - March 20, 2010, 10:16 am

when I was growing up this vehicle was a dune buggy.
rogueagent - June 24, 2009, 3:20 pm
Look into a Tomcar or the Jackal/HMT by Supacat.
AXL - June 23, 2009, 11:49 pm
Is it wrong that I want a veicle almost like that?
Eternal Lord Jackass - June 21, 2009, 8:29 am
But let's face it, it's more fun than letting Data drive right?
Sean - June 14, 2009, 2:56 am
What do you call a Trekie virgin? A Trekie.


TAGS: life cards
Rating: 3.43/5

More motifakes by ronsart

Ed-Hyde - July 27, 2009, 10:26 am
Wow ron, that was actually motivational. Course, now I want to slit my wrists with playing cards...
Haarakkon - July 26, 2009, 7:23 pm
than that, I mean
Haarakkon - July 26, 2009, 7:22 pm
Yup, that's how it goes. That's about the time I stopped playing, when I moved out of Seattle. Guess a little longer...
Mooooooooooooooooooo - July 26, 2009, 7:21 pm
I don't tolerate whiners or crybabies...If you can't afford to lose...you should stay at home.
Mooooooooooooooooooo - July 26, 2009, 7:19 pm
11 years of weekly poker. The "craze" only increased the number of douchebags I had to throw out of my game.
Haarakkon - July 26, 2009, 6:54 pm
Oh, I'm aware of that, my friend. I was playing, as I'm sure you were, long before the game became all the rage with Texas Hold 'Em and ESPN.
Mooooooooooooooooooo - July 26, 2009, 6:49 pm
No offense buddy, but the game you describe is little girl poker. Wild cards are for old women. FYI I started drinking early today and the "sarcastic a**hole" stage is upon me right now.
Haarakkon - July 26, 2009, 6:43 pm
Weeellll... It's all I get, seems. Real poor hand with 7 card double draw, deuces, 1 eyed jacks and suicide kings wild.
Mooooooooooooooooooo - July 26, 2009, 6:20 pm
you're a fan of the "dead man's hand" Haar?
Haarakkon - July 26, 2009, 6:04 pm
Aces and Eights, Aces and Eights.

RELIGION - Believing that if you worship something enough, random chance suddenly becomes the will of all-powerful, supernatural forces

VALENTINES DAY - Yup that time of year is coming back around again

WISDOM - Do I feel bad for the person who always fails the worst? No I feel bad for the person who always nearly fails the worst. Why? Because he fails at failing

AGGY - apology accepted

TAGS: culos aggy haz green card
Rating: 4.82/5

More motifakes by culos

agdaniele - February 21, 2011, 5:43 pm
Well, I fail to see why I need to show my... wait, what? I'm illegal?
culos - February 21, 2011, 5:07 pm
BUMP! (I want Aggy to see this one)

It's not about the cards you're dealt -

TAGS: card deal play hand calendar
Rating: 4.63/5

More motifakes by Rick69

GaryO - September 9, 2015, 8:55 am
the bluff has always worked for me...usually...sometimes...well, there was that one time. it only takes onetime, ya'know.
EmilioDumphque - September 8, 2015, 7:03 pm
Oh, OK. Thanks Mr. Trump. That totally explains why you're rich, and how it had nothing to do with inheriting 200 million bucks.

LIFE OR DEATH - It brings out the worst in people

TAGS: airline safety card worst people oxygen mask fire crash brace airplane
Rating: 3.61/5

More motifakes by WTF

Treehodger - February 17, 2010, 9:50 pm
I kind of wish the last cell in the middle row for fire (Where the adult and kid sit). I wish the adult was using the kid as a human shield from the flames. That would be hysterical. Regardless, 5Ls!

CARDS - Because nothing says I love you more

Politically Correct Christmas Card -


FATE - I played poker with a deck of Tarot cards once. I got a full house and everyone died. -Steven Wright

TAGS: fate tarot cards
Rating: 4.31/5

More motifakes by thehellisthat

Faceplant31 - May 27, 2010, 5:06 pm

PAPER OR PLASTIC BAG? - Burlap is not an option.

TAGS: debit card
Rating: 4.29/5

More motifakes by ughomer

thecrotchetyoldcynic - May 25, 2014, 12:36 pm
I posted it on Epic Fail, but you've given me inspiration to post it here :-D
thecrotchetyoldcynic - May 25, 2014, 12:35 pm
Oh, my God! ROFLMAO! Reminds me of what I found at a grocery store. Someone had been shoving pennies instead if quarters. A sign was posted not to insert pennies. However, that form of currency was misspelled.


TAGS: travel greencard danger rerun
Rating: 4.21/5

More motifakes by rerun

Reality Lord - November 29, 2010, 3:01 pm

5L from me but dude i think you should lay off of aggy with these zingers.
agdaniele - November 28, 2010, 9:21 pm
Love it!

BLURRED PERCEPTION - After the first glass, you see things as you wish they were. After the second, you see things as they are not. Finally, you see things as they really are, and that is the most horrible thing in the world - Oscar Wilde

RACE CARD II - Yeah, it's gettin' old . . . like Jimmy Carter.

TAGS: race card liberals obama
Rating: 3.44/5

More motifakes by Todd Snyder

BoneCD - September 18, 2009, 11:31 pm
I'm listening...so good night all
Paul Kondor Poduszlo - September 18, 2009, 11:29 pm
Funny, I'm watching Beck as I type. He's the man.
Sean - September 17, 2009, 3:14 pm
While I'm normally a Citzens for bysenberry jam fan, I kinda resent any statement that is potentially inflamatory while at the same time almost totally incapable of being substantiated -- unless it's about that a-hole Glenn Beck. Bad Carter. Bad boy.
Mooooooooooooooooooo - September 17, 2009, 1:42 am
WTFO - September 17, 2009, 1:33 am
I'd say that's normally the case. The real problem is when the race card is used for things that clearly aren't race related, then it becomes crying wolf and is ignored when there is a real act of racism that needs to be corrected.
iamjet - September 17, 2009, 1:06 am
I sincerely believe that the only ones crying race, are racist.
Sean - September 16, 2009, 11:35 pm
Ha Ha Jimmy Carter's old now. That's fu*kkin funny, dude.

TOO MUCH TIME ON YOUR HANDS - You're doin' it right.

TAGS: cards games time bored
Rating: 3.43/5

More motifakes by todd snyder

omeganeep - October 13, 2009, 8:54 pm
epic fail if it fell


TAGS: podiatrist cardiologist
Rating: 4.22/5

More motifakes by IllicoPresto

gas - November 6, 2011, 9:33 pm
Verdeckt - November 6, 2011, 2:28 pm
Umm.. Those are some pretty big feet to be wearing stockings... Holiday snaps?

EVEN THE CAPTAIN - Panics when his two girls meet up.


SPARE TIME - Some people just have toooooo much.

TAGS: spare time cards much people
Rating: 3.37/5
spacedog - August 20, 2010, 6:09 pm
It's been a while since it's been said, but anonymous posters usually get 1L. So please let us know who you are next time.
Faceplant31 - August 20, 2010, 10:33 am

CARDBOARD SUBMARINES - There's a fundamental design flaw there somewhere

TAGS: cardboard submarine
Rating: 3.24/5

More motifakes by K Wells

Derek - October 9, 2009, 4:09 pm
Looks as though it has been under some pressure. Depth charges to the stern, I'd hazard.

FACEPALMING - the REAL "Picard Maneuver"

TAGS: the real picard maneuver
Rating: 3.1/5

ACCOMPLISHMENTS - Some men devote their lives to achieving the near impossible. Others set their sights much, much lower.

MASTER CHIEF - Corrupting the minds of children since 2001

TAGS: master chief j******t card pokemon halo
Rating: 2.64/5

More motifakes by darthreavan1

LOLOLOL - July 1, 2009, 3:06 pm
Honestly, POKEMON?!?! i'd perfer if they make a card game called Strike, which takes characters from vid games, history, movies and pins them aganst each other with factors based on stratagy offense speed ETC
Mr. Shiny - June 5, 2009, 11:44 pm
Why Pokemon?
Vision (the Unpurple) - May 4, 2009, 5:12 pm
Yeah, grass type seems about right.

A PISSED OFF ALUCARD - and you really don't want to get on his bad side, he may just have to use his gun on you, and you don't want that

Exhibit: A -

TAGS: rerun man card trial exhibit
Rating: 5/5

More motifakes by Ism

lgvernon - August 3, 2013, 7:10 pm

I heard there were hors d'oeuvres with those little parasol picks in them, too...

The Grim Reaper -

KEVIN WARE INJURY - Just got done choking down "EASTER DINNER", when this happened Now here it is back up all over the table in front of me. .


TAGS: sick clean internet cards guests
Rating: 4.88/5

More motifakes by Ism

mariand - February 2, 2013, 11:18 am
hehehe...good idea...not that I encourage laziness ;)

discarded -

wise advice -


TAGS: christmas cards
Rating: 4.71/5

More motifakes by Airman

Ozbad - June 17, 2012, 5:52 pm
It puts the lotion on it's skin ..

MICHAEL LAUDRUP - To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

TAGS: swansworld marvin swansea premiership cardiff
Rating: 4.69/5

More motifakes by funkyfigaro

rerun - July 12, 2012, 8:53 pm

sound advise if I ever heard it

dewey and his decimals -



TAGS: vintage pinup creditcard misunderstanding humor
Rating: 4.55/5

More motifakes by lgvernon

lgvernon - June 17, 2013, 9:46 pm

LOL~~thanks, Bone!~
BoneCD - June 17, 2013, 9:33 pm
Ahhhh...if only my wife knew...5L


TAGS: would a cardboard box by a drainage ditch qualify as a mansion by a lake
Rating: 4.51/5

More motifakes by TheTrashHeap

agdaniele - May 8, 2010, 12:41 pm
This one really hits me... I like it a lot.
spacedog - April 5, 2010, 12:07 am
Awesome Trash, 5+.
Cubbybear - April 4, 2010, 8:19 pm
5/5 great poster
TheTrashHeap - April 4, 2010, 5:18 pm
Thanks Aggy. I rather like this one myself. Prophetic or not.
agdaniele - April 4, 2010, 4:51 pm
I love it. 5 teary-eyed L's


TAGS: need a card and clothespin
Rating: 4.5/5

More motifakes by Greeny

pzykosiz - November 13, 2011, 5:02 pm
ewww i'm touching caveman
guyfox - November 12, 2011, 7:17 pm
I can see a little bit of me in the corner
rerun - November 12, 2011, 3:45 pm

I see a few I don't know
Sho - November 12, 2011, 1:08 pm
That's my best angle
gas - November 11, 2011, 10:50 pm
same here, I think I saw a little piece of me there xD
IllicoPresto - November 11, 2011, 10:26 pm
Glad to be a member. I think.
Mooooooooooooooooooo - November 11, 2011, 10:16 pm
thanks Greeny, I'm proud to be included. And a little sad about all the good folks we don't see anymore.
maoworks2 - November 11, 2011, 6:49 pm
I'll dring to that !!
mariand - November 11, 2011, 5:26 pm
amsome...we all sail in the same boat
the1stCOMMI3 - November 11, 2011, 4:12 pm
so where do i fit in?


Credit Cards -

SAVE UNO - I don't give a crap about education but I LOVE that GAME!

TAGS: uno cards protest demonstration humor
Rating: 4/5

More motifakes by steve1961

MissPriss - May 21, 2012, 1:11 pm
2nd good chuckle of the day! Usually give a 5L only to the first but hungover this morning so...5L for everyone! (GaryO's buying).



TAGS: hosting parties unfortunately bacardi and cola declined an invitation
Rating: 3.79/5

More motifakes by Produceman117

spacedog - December 16, 2009, 9:05 pm
LOL. 5Ls.


TAGS: reason cards season internet pc
Rating: 3.73/5

More motifakes by timmey

boinger - March 10, 2011, 9:56 am
Merry ChristmaHannuKwanzaa-dan! PC Bastards. It's Merry f in Christmas!
pzykosiz - November 27, 2010, 3:41 am
someone tried to make it taboo because it has the word 'hell' in it
rerun - November 26, 2010, 6:04 pm

soon it will be taboo to even say hello.
jameswnash - November 26, 2010, 5:55 pm
Happy Chrishanukwan!
rerun - November 26, 2010, 9:19 am

ain't that the truth.....


LATINO GANGSTERS - Reading obituaries

PORCELINA - Before Motifake she used to have a very different method of keeping herself occupied.

CREDIT CARDS - Letting you buy stupid crap you don't need with money you don't have (and ripping you off for 18%)

TAGS: cards credit money debt funny
Rating: 3.22/5

More motifakes by WTFO

Woodywood03a - January 27, 2010, 4:55 pm
You are right on the ball there.
agdaniele - October 29, 2009, 5:42 pm
I like when Derek comments... it's like my logic decided to walk away with a barely relevant parting sh**.
Derek - October 29, 2009, 5:38 pm
...only if you're too slack to pay the minimum
me - October 7, 2008, 5:45 am
aint that the truth...

MY GOD - Quick! Gordon! The Bat Signal, now!

flour -

TAGS: carded for flour cocaine wtf
Rating: 3/5

More motifakes by thecrotchetyoldcynic

CloudchaserS - September 25, 2013, 3:20 am
Would I be correct in thinking that they're doing it because they think kids will try to sell it as cocaine?
thecrotchetyoldcynic - September 24, 2013, 8:16 pm
And they might want to sample it. That's when those things get nasty. You've seen movies; True Romance. Wrong thing said at the wrong time.
Mooooooooooooooooooo - September 24, 2013, 6:39 pm
that's correct. If you sell a tiny flap of sugar when the buyer expects cocaine, you're charged with selling cocaine...Happened to a guy I went to school with. It was hilarious, he was a douche bag.
curlyrocks - September 24, 2013, 5:20 pm
I was told in Ontario and probably the rest of Canada you are charged with what you represent selling. And you're probably correct that they won't hand over the cash until they have evidence of you representing it as cocaine. But you might get lucky.
lgvernon - September 24, 2013, 3:53 pm

Curly~~that's called 'sales in lieu of', and trust me, it's very unlikely that any cop is going to pass over buy money until he/she has enough on ***e to make it clear the seller is selling dope~~whether it turns out to be bogus or not.
curlyrocks - September 24, 2013, 3:19 pm
I always wondered what would happen if you sold flower to cops trying to set up a sting. So long as you never call it cocaine you should be fine.
thecrotchetyoldcynic - September 24, 2013, 2:58 pm
In the Bay Area I've had this occur numerous times. First Walsnot then Safeway.
thecrotchetyoldcynic - September 24, 2013, 2:58 pm
In the Bay Area I've had this occur numerous times. First Walsnot then Safeway.
CloudchaserS - September 24, 2013, 11:41 am
Who and where? I goodsearched, but couldn't find anything.

ALUCARD'S VACATION TO AFGHANISTAN - and he is thinking about having lunch

TAGS: alucard vacation eat
Rating: 2.89/5

More motifakes by lovely.angie

agdaniele - December 14, 2009, 5:37 pm
What a relief... I was sick of repeatedly rejecting this.

DEFINE: ARSE (CHOSE ONE) - 1.)Washed up politician who won't retire. 2.)Where to apply Prep H. 3.)White dude playin' the race card.

TAGS: democrats race card arse carter obama
Rating: 2.82/5

More motifakes by Todd Snyder

Sean - September 22, 2009, 11:54 pm
PRESIDENT CARTER The Reagan the Ronald wished he was and pretended to be. (See Murray Rothbard at the Mises Institute for your dose of de-Cool-Aid-ification, ya GOP dupes!)
Sean - September 22, 2009, 11:51 pm
No avatar, no choice. No exceptions!!!!
WTFO2 - September 22, 2009, 11:40 pm
Can I choose all of the above?
ILB - September 22, 2009, 8:36 pm
Agreed. Carter needs to STFU.

CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR WEDDING DAY! - Too bad no one likes your husband.


TAGS: toilette cardboard box **** craft
Rating: 2.36/5

More motifakes by Noab

tempest - March 16, 2009, 2:43 pm
thats not card board thats dry wall

CAC-CARD - SCORE! I found mine, WHEW! the D-FAC is closing soon! And it's FAJITA-FRIDAYS!

MAN CARD - Stop reading it, and just hand it over bitch

CARDBOARD - used to box anything

TAGS: cardboard
Rating: 1.89/5

More motifakes by sean

KAMTSJATKA - is that a country?

TAGS: risk full house boris card cards poker fun
Rating: 1.66/5

More motifakes by koen

Jmac0585 - May 12, 2009, 2:06 pm
Frenchise - It's Risk, dummy.
Gezundheit - September 10, 2008, 11:40 pm
Oh, I thought you sneezed
Frenchise - June 4, 2008, 2:38 pm
it is on very old Dutch Stratego biaaatch! its pwwnn epic ***bs! well, ok not epic ***bs, but it sure pwns a loooooot!

Poker -

TAGS: poker gun cards flush western
Rating: 5/5

More motifakes by JesusWept

Preacher Man - March 23, 2015, 11:29 pm
A Smith & Wesson beats four aces.

Work Out -

TAGS: working out cardio driving radio
Rating: 5/5

More motifakes by MissPriss

mizzdizz - December 10, 2014, 10:22 pm
If my partner at the time had been flashing, you would have noticed... Oh yeah!!! He was F-I-N-E!!!!!!! LOL!
MissPriss - December 9, 2014, 11:51 pm
I don't care what you're flashing when you're on the highway...I'm usually driving too fast to notice!
mizzdizz - December 8, 2014, 5:23 am
I was the large white thing with those annoying flashing red lights on top with a rolling bed the back commonly mistaken for a taxi, Bandaid Application Distribution And Supply Service! B. A. D. A. S. S. LOL!
MissPriss - December 7, 2014, 8:13 pm
Sooo, it was you causing all those long 4 lane traffic jams! Bad girl!
MissPriss - December 7, 2014, 8:11 pm
9mm, a little too heavy. I carry a nice oak baseball bat behind my seat!
MissPriss - December 7, 2014, 8:09 pm
Huh...guess I burn 5 times more when I turn all 5 fingers into a fist...teehee.
mizzdizz - December 7, 2014, 5:48 pm
Lived in L.A. when that was a problem on the freeways---How does an Angeleno commit suicide? Drive to work. There were more jokes. Stress = humor, really dark sick humor! At least driving to work wasn't boring! LOL!
Thedge - December 7, 2014, 2:55 pm
Ahh... the number one driver salutation. Number two, some idiot paying homage with a return salute, via 9mm. Stupidity. More dangerous than global warming.
mizzdizz - December 6, 2014, 11:43 pm
I burn lots of calories when I drive---I exercise my middle finger!

Waiter? -

TAGS: go get ts card punched
Rating: 4.2/5

More motifakes by Thedge

Thedge - November 6, 2014, 12:50 am
Thank you. Oh Froggy went a'courtin and he did ride, mmhmm.
MissPriss - November 6, 2014, 12:13 am